Showing posts with label jokes. Show all posts
Showing posts with label jokes. Show all posts

Monday, 18 July 2016

It is so fucking hot!

This is a post to complain about the amazing weather we are having here in the UK. Me and a friend were talking the other day, yea I have a friend, at least one, about the weather and how shit it has been for the past few weeks at the weekends. Now we all know this is because industry works all week, creating some delicious stuff and blowing it out of their chimneys into the atmosphere and then when it settles downs over the weekend, it rains down on us like we shouldn't enjoy the weekend.

Now we are having amazing weather, everyone is moaning about that as well. Now, I am English and live in England so I was wondering if this is the same in other countries? Do people just moan constantly wherever you are in the world. I know that we have Germans, Americas and a lot of other countries represented here so tell me what you guys do.

Maybe it is just because we know we will get sunburn to all fuck now so we have to stay indoors or something. i dunno, I think we are just a bunch of whiny bastards, let me know if you are too and share this around so we can get a poll going about who is the biggest whiners in the world, I am sure it is us! We moan about everything, even queue, not while queuing but we damn sure do afterwards!

Saturday, 9 July 2016

Something interesting about a haberdashery


As I was watching a film the other night, to relax and unwind after a day of avoiding real work, I stumbled across the word ‘haberdashery’ and realised that I had no idea what it meant.

 I can not say what film I was watching as I do not have the funds to pay the charges of doing such as thing, but it was the eighth installment in a directors arsenal and it was all set in a place called Minnie’s Haberdashery. If you don’t know who or what I am talking about, read yourself Ezekiel 25:17 or I will strike down upon thee with great vengeance!

Anywhoo, I asked my dad, cos he’s old and the word sounds old so I thought that the planets would align. He didn’t know so then I was stuck. Then I remembered this thing called the internet, you might have heard of it. I went on there and….

What the fuck did I find?

Haberdashery, here is the UK means a shop that sells cloths, thread, pins and stuff used for sewing. In the US it means clothing for men, or a shop that sell it. The word originally comes from haberdasher, which is the person who made the stuff to sell. Pretty cool job name if you ask me!

So I got thinking about that film again, “...like a forest it’s easy to lose our way…to forget where you came in”. No idea why that quote is in there! Anyway, in the film, the haberdashery sells sweets, coffee, had a bed (no idea why, I hope for the people that live in the haberdashery and not for the sordid things I am thinking about) and at no point did we see any men being tailored or any sewing stuff being bought! I’m not angry, I am just disappointed.

Well, now you know what haberdashery means, I hope I haven’t spoilt the film for you, I don’t want a bunch of angry people (perhaps a group of eight that are hateful) commenting saying anything mean.

Anyway, you know the rules, if you found it interesting or didn’t know the meaning you have to share it! Thanks for reading and I’ll catch you at dogs, you inglorious bastards!



Friday, 8 July 2016

Something interesting about shadows


This is going to be a quick one, it’s Friday and I want to get drunk, don’t you judge me! I want to discuss shadows and a thought I just had. Shadows are a by product of light. If you direct a light at an object, let’s say a can of beer, a shadow will form on the other side of the beer. This happens because the object itself is blocking the light from getting passed.

I was thinking about whether it would be possible to create a shadow without a light, of course it wouldn’t be possible but it would be cool to have a torch that instead of producing light, produced a shadow. You may already think that I am on the beer but I am not, this is my brain clean and sober!


Thanks for reading, if you found this article interesting, then you know the rules, share it with your friends. If you didn’t, follow along anyway and wait for something you do find interesting!

Something interesting about selfies


I am quite partial to taking a few photos here and there, not of myself as I look like a bags of wet cats with acne and an attitude but of other things. Now most photographers, beginners and pros, will tell you that you spend more time in front of the computer than you do behind your camera. This time is spent editing the colours, cropping and playing around with your photos to make them just right to show to the world, the world that doesn’t care.

As I was sitting in front of my computer the other day, I stumbled across the clarity tool! A really cool tool that allows you to make stuff look really old and horrible, if you push it towards the right. However, if you push it towards the left, something terrible happens. Your photo begins to look more and more like all of the selfies on Facebook that people take when they are bored.

See for yourself, you can get editing apps on your phone that can do it, you know the ones, they are the ones that the girls on your Facebook page use.

What the fuck this means

This means, simply, everyone knows that the selfie you just took spontaneously, wasn’t a spontaneous as you say it was. It was edited to within an inch of its life because you don’t want to people to see the real you yet you do want the world to give you some attention.

I get that showing the world the real you is tough, the world is a scary place, the internet being the most scary place in the world. However, please understand that everyone knows what you are doing and everyone is talking about it, whether they comment saying how beautiful you are or not, we are all talking about it and we all know your little secret.

Just the tip (a tip and a penis joke)

If you are taking a photo with an unshaven guy in it and you try and use this app, your cover will be blown. An airbrushed looking beard is a bit of a give away.

The outcome

Using these sorts of apps is a sign that you need attention every moment of the day, even the moments when you don’t feel you look your best. I respect that a lot of us get bored throughout the day, why do you think I am writing this and avoiding doing real work? But understand that everyone is being nice, we know what you’re doing and know why you’re doing it. If you are cool with that then I guess we have to be as well, but it won’t stop smart arses like me writing blogs about you and hiding behind their words on the internet!

Thanks for reading this, if you found this interesting or funny then, you know the rules, share it with your friends. If you didn’t then follow the blog and wait for something your find interesting to come up and share that.

Thursday, 7 July 2016

Something interesting about coffee and calcium

As I was having one of many coffees the other day, I began thinking that I was drinking far too much coffee. It came to me when my heart began this weird dance in my chest. I got to thinking about packing it all in but then I realised, my coffees are my only source of calcium a day! I don’t eat cereal, because I’m not a child and I barely eat cheese because of the scary monsters that live under my bed.

This then got me thinking, how much calcium do we actually need per day? Oh and also why the fuck am I still paying attention to the idea that calcium makes your bones stronger? That’s what my mum said when I was a kid, she also said stuff about going blind yet I didn’t take that advice on board!

The recommended daily intake of calcium is between 1,000 and 1,200 milligrams a day. Unless your pregnant or lactating, that doesn’t and will never apply to me, but if it does to you then give yourself 1,500 milligrams.

What the fuck that all means.

There is about 275 milligrams of calcium in a cup of milk. I know this because I just googled it. So in order for me to get the right amount of calcium into my body, to make my bones nice and strong, I need to drink 3.6 cups of milk per day. If I were to continue to use my coffee as a way of ingesting my daily calcium intake, I would need to drink about 7 cups of coffee a day, yes my coffee is half full of milk, don’t judge me, you’re just as weird as I am.

So, if like me, you want to get your recommended daily intake of calcium and use a fun way of doing it, drink 7 cups of coffee a day and bounce around the fucking walls all day and annoy anyone you come into contact with.

Well, this just goes to show how wrong you can be. I turned to the internet for advice, worrying about my calcium intake and now I find that I need to drink even more coffee rather than giving it up! At least I know and have dodged a bullet! Hopefully you have learnt something today about calcium and have dodged a bullet yourself!

Remember the rules, if you found this blog interesting then you have to share it with your friends. If you didn’t then follow the blog and wait for something you do find interesting and then share that instead.

Wednesday, 6 July 2016

Welcome to, Stuff you might find interesting.


This is a blog dedicated to stuff that I find interesting and stuff that you may also find interesting. That basically sums up what this blog is all about but as there is a lot more page to be taken up, let’s write some more.

I am a freelance writer and, as any freelance writer out there will know, you have to research a lot of odd stuff for the job. As a result of this I have a bunch of useless, yet interesting information in my head that I may as well share with someone before I loose my mind or forget it all.

A disclaimer: not everything on this blog will be interesting to you, most of it won’t even be interesting to me. It is ok to laugh and judge me for my mistakes, go on laugh, I don’t even know there is mistake, if I did, it wouldn’t be there.

Lastly, if you do find something you find interesting then share it with your friends. This isn’t necessarily a rule, in fact yes it is! Anything you find interesting, share it with your friends to make yourself sound like a badass and help me out as well! We all win!


Thank you for checking out Stuff you might find interesting. Now go and read something that you might find interesting.